{"id":140,"date":"2004-07-03T05:52:00","date_gmt":"2004-07-03T11:52:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/?p=140"},"modified":"2004-07-03T05:52:00","modified_gmt":"2004-07-03T11:52:00","slug":"chantals-flat-seapoint-cape-town","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/chantals-flat-seapoint-cape-town\/","title":{"rendered":"Chantal’s Flat, Seapoint, Cape Town"},"content":{"rendered":"

Saturday, July 03, 2004<\/h2>\n

Service: * * * *
\n
Food: * * * * 1\/2
\n
Ambience: * * * *
\n
Babe Count: * * * <\/i> * *<\/b><\/p>\n

\"AIan Henderson, you’re the best! You rock, you fine musician fellow, you!<\/p>\n

You know why Ian rocks? It’s because of his friends.<\/p>\n

He’s invited me to supper at a buddy of his. His sms to me read, “Supper tonight in Seapoint. Assorted babeage.”<\/p>\n

Holy moly. He understated. This is not ASSORTED babeage. This is PRIME babeage. This is the whole nine yards.<\/p>\n

It’s me, Ian, Ian’s girlfriend Anneke, and four single, unmarried, available… morsels, delicacies. Ayeeeeeeeeeee!!!<\/p>\n

On my right is Chantal, an architect. She’s going to be going to Australia in a month or two, to be with a boy she met while travelling. Lucky him! But in the interim, as far as I can tell, she’s living in the here and now.<\/p>\n

Sitting next to her is Heather, a homeopath, living in Kalk Bay. Fairly quiet, dazzling. Delicious, eat-me-now eyes.<\/p>\n

Next to Heather is Fotini, a Greek mega-goddess. This chick is sex on turbo charged pogo stick. Angular face, carved beauty. Lean, muscled. A kite surfer. And studying homeopathy.<\/p>\n

\"Fotini.And then there’s Mariane, curly blonde hair, a satin sarong wrapped casually over her eligible hips, unfortunately marred by the fact that its winter in Cape Town, meaning she’s wearing jeans under the sarong instead of just a g-string or nothing. She’s also a homeopath, practising in Paarl.<\/p>\n

Ian’s girlfriend is a lawyer, and she’s got long, straight blonde hair, and she’s a total slinky being too.<\/p>\n

Sigh.<\/p>\n

And the conversation is hot.<\/p>\n

We’re talking about sex, and Ian and I are doing our best to be sincere communicators of the male experience. What we’re really doing is a propaganda job, selling the idea that we’re simply the most astounding male beings they’ve ever encountered. And of course, I’m drawing whoever I can, and taking phone numbers and email addresses as a pretext for contacting them.<\/p>\n

Chantal looks at my sketch of Heather, and asks for a turn. Seeing as she’s an architect and all, I hand over the palmtop, and show her how to use the drawing software. She pumps out a quick portrait of me, and exclaims that she wants a palmtop like mine. But she’s saving as much as she can for Australia, so she probably won’t be buying one. But hey… if I can persuade her to buy a palmtop, maybe she won’t go to Australia, and then she’ll ditch the thug she’s going to meet, and maybe I’ll stand a chance? <\/p>\n

Roy Blumenthal is a writer, director, artist, and visual facilitator<\/a>. Hire him to make pictures of your meetings or workshops.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Saturday, July 03, 2004 Service: * * * * Food: * * * * 1\/2 Ambience: * * * * Babe Count: * * * * * Ian Henderson, you’re the best! You rock, you fine musician fellow, you! You …<\/p>\n

Chantal’s Flat, Seapoint, Cape Town<\/span> Read More »<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-140","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p521FP-2g","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=140"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=140"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=140"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/royblumenthal.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=140"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}