Friday, July 30, 2004 Service: * * * 1/2 Food: * * * * Ambience: * * * * Babe Count: * * * * * Phone: +27 11 447 0300 Friday night, and all the models and glamour babes are out in force. They’re sitting lithely at the be-seen tables here at Primi. And N. and I have miraculously found a table out on the balcony. Ringside seats. But she and I aren’t model-watching. We’re fully absorbed in each other. I can’t tell you…Continue Reading “Primi Piatti, The Zone, Rosebank”

Thursday, July 29, 2004 Service: * * * * Food: * * * * Ambience: * * * * Babe Count: * * Phone: +27 11 486 4576 On the table beside my plate is a book that Erich has hauled out of his library for me. “Have it,” he says. “I’m married. I won’t be needing it anymore.” “You sure?” I say. “Janet’s not into this?” He gives me a look. Doesn’t answer. Could be a yes. Could be a no. It’s a subject…Continue Reading “Cafe Ove Flo, Greenside”

JB Rivers, Hyde Park

Tuesday, July 27, 2004 Service: * * * Food: * * * 1/2 Ambience: * * * * Babe Count: * * * * * Phone: +27 11 325 5055 You know, being a serial monogamist can be a bit of a bitch. I’ve been sitting here reading and playing solitaire on my palmtop since after a late lunch with Eran. He’s flying to Israel tomorrow for a holiday, and to scout out some filmmaking possibilities for the production company we’re forming together. Yesterday he…Continue Reading “JB Rivers, Hyde Park”

Monday, July 26, 2004 Service: * * * 1/2 Food: * * 1/2 Ambience: * * Babe Count: * * * * As usual, Danny’s a joy of a waiter. Very pleasant, paying attention to details like ensuring that I have no mushrooms anywhere near anything I eat. “What’s that?” he says, pointing to the huge, obscene trophy sitting beside my backgammon board. I’m playing Ana tonight, my second game of the new cycle. She’s top of the B-division, and I’m second. “This,” I say,…Continue Reading “Wiesenhof, Killarney”

Saturday, July 24, 2004 Service: * * * * * Food: * * * * * Ambience: * * * * * Babe Count: * * * * * Okay, so I’ve got some adjustments to make, aside from things sexual. See, I’m a cat person. And Karen is a dog person. The redeeming factor is that she has a cat, Norman, who makes up for the five Dachshunds waddling around the place. Norman makes up for the five dogs in sheer bulk. Norman the…Continue Reading “Karen’s Place, Northgate”

Spaza Gallery, Troyeville

Thursday, July 22, 2004 Service: * * * Food: * * * * Ambience: * * * Babe Count: * * * * Linda, our model for tonight, is late. She got her mom to drive her to the wrong venue by mistake. Assumed that Spaza Gallery in Troyeville was the same as the Spark Gallery in Norwood. I’m on the phone to her mom. “I’m VERY annoyed! VERY!” says her mom. “This is MOST unprofessional! MOST!” “I can hear that you’re really angry,” I…Continue Reading “Spaza Gallery, Troyeville”

The Showcase Theatre, Banbury Cross, Northriding

Wednesday, July 21, 2004 Service: * * Food: * * 1/2 Ambience: * * * Babe Count: * * * * Alistair Plint has invited me and a partner to an exclusive preview evening of a new standup comedy concept he’s created with a bunch of other comedians. THE COMEDY SHOP is the show, and this is its first public outing. Which is why Karen and I are sitting at a table right near the stage. And you know what? It’s realllllly hilarious! Vicus, the…Continue Reading “The Showcase Theatre, Banbury Cross, Northriding”

Doppio Zero, Greenside

Sunday, July 18, 2004 Service: * * * 1/2 Food: * * * 1/2 Ambience: * * * * Babe Count: * * * * * Phone: +27 11 646 8740 I’ve been shopping to prepare for this date with Karen. I have something stuffed into my satchel, away from her prying eyes. “I have a small symbolic present for you,” I say. This is our second meeting, and she’s clearly sceptical about getting a present from me this soon. I open the bag, and…Continue Reading “Doppio Zero, Greenside”

Saturday, July 17, 2004 Service: * * * Food: * * * Ambience: * * * 1/2 Babe Count: * * * * I’ve just met S., the third babe from the internet dating service I’m on. She’s a babe. Matches her photos nicely. “I don’t really like photos,” she says. “I don’t like sitting over photo albums and reminding myself of the past. Boring.” We’re at Paputzi’s in Linden, and we’re out in the garden during lunchtime. While it’s not exactly freezing — the…Continue Reading “Paputzi’s, Linden”

The Spaza Gallery, Troyeville

Thursday, July 15, 2004 Service: * * * Food: * * * * Ambience: * * * Babe Count: * * * Lionel has sourced a really interesting model for the portrait circle tonight. That’s why Linda from Exclusive Books isn’t here tonight. She’ll be our model next week. Maria has a fairly heavy jawline, quite jowly, and with really interesting angles to her cheeks. Long hair, with silver showing at the roots. Maybe it’s because I’m thinking about things like Mastery & Submission, but…Continue Reading “The Spaza Gallery, Troyeville”