From the monthly archives:

July 2004

Primi Piatti, The Zone, Rosebank

by Roy Blumenthal on July 30, 2004

Friday, July 30, 2004

Service: * * * 1/2

Food: * * * *

Ambience: * * * *

Babe Count: * * * * *

Phone: +27 11 447 0300

Friday night, and all the models and glamour babes are out in force. They’re sitting lithely at the be-seen tables here at Primi. And N. and I have miraculously found a table out on the balcony. Ringside seats.

But she and I aren’t model-watching. We’re fully absorbed in each other.

I can’t tell you who she is, cos she has a boyfriend. And what we’re talking about is stuff that might just freak him out and mess up her relationship. So she’ll remain N. She’s a girl I’d like to get to know a LOT better. Let’s leave it at that. And lemme just say that I’ve wanted her from the very first time I saw her. And that she smsed me earlier to say, “Hey Roy, long time no see! How about coffee??”

I knew from the presence of two question marks that she’s keen on me. Okay. I’ll admit it… I didn’t exactly KNOW. It was more like I WISHED that she was keen on me.

“But Roy!!!” you may be shrieking, “what about Karen!!!”

Well, two things. Firstly, I’m SEEING her, and learning about her, and finding out if we like each other enough to commit to a relationship. Secondly, I’ve made it clear to her that I’m currently monogamous with her, even though I’m uncomfortable with this. And I don’t break my word. So I’m fine being here with N. And I’m fine about wanting to fuck her. Cos I know I’m not going to. Simple as that. But I WANT to. Okay? Got this outta the way? Good. Let’s move on.

We started out our coffee meeting earlier at Seattle Coffee Company.

“Tell me everything about this new girl in your life,” she said. She follows this site, so she’s seen the stuff about D/s. “I want DETAILS!” she says.

So I tell her about making love the D/s way. I tell her about tying Karen up. And various other things. And with every detail, she’s kinda gasping.

“Wow!” she says. “Sounds liberating.”

“Now you’re in a new relationship?” I say. She’s alluded to the presence of a dude on the scene.

“Well, it’s only been a few weeks,” she says. “And he’s a really nice guy. Really very nice. Treats me very well. A gentleman. Very… uh… kind and considerate. Gentle.” She’s looking at me very oddly. Her head is cocked to one side, and there’s a kind of pain in her eyes. Her black hair frames her cheeks, and sitting here in the leather armchair in Seattle Coffee Co, I want to comfort her for making the wrong choice.

“Is he giving you what you want?” I ask.

She pauses, her head still cocked. She says, “No, he’s not.”

“What do you want?” I ask.

She leans forward, and the pain leaves her face. She whispers, “D/s.”

I don’t hear her properly. “Did you say, ‘D/s’?” I ask.

“Yes.”

She’s looking at me hard, leaning forward. She’s reaching for me. I feel her soul stretching for mine. I take my sarong in my hands. I use it as a scarf usually. But I’ve employed it effectively in restraining Karen before.

“N.,” I say, looking hard into her eyes, “put your hands together in front of you.”

She does.

I put my sarong around her wrists, do a complicated little jig, and she’s tied up. I grasp the knot, and tug gently. “Is this what you want?”

She’s been gasping as I’ve been tying, and now, in the coffee shop, she tilts her head back, her chin angled, her eyes fixed to mine. “Yes!” she breathes. And I can see from the way her body’s poised and from the look on her face that she’s hit subspace. It’s uncanny. This is exactly the space that Karen lives for. It’s the space that submissives around the world crave. And now, the first time it’s ever been done to her, N. experiences the zone.

“Let’s go and eat,” I say. And I undo the knot.

“Oh!” she gasps as I release her.

Jesus. I want to fuck her right now. Right this second. I want to consume this woman. Damn this monogamy stuff!!!!!! Ugh! Why the hell do I have such a strict moral code? What’s WRONG with me??? Sigh.

We go to Primi Piatti.

En route, we stop off at Stone Cherry, the designer boutique. There’s an outfit on display that I feel compelled to praise the shop assistant for. I tell her, “Sissie, I just want to say that any woman wearing that outfit can have me anytime she wants!”

The shop woman says, “Oh! If only I had your number! There could have been many women who would have had you!”

N. is wandering around touching fabrics. “Wow!” she says. “This is a skirt!” It’s a mock suede, and it’s just divine. Ayee. I want to wear this skirt! I put my sarong around N.’s neck. I use it to choke her, very gently, increasing the pressure. She tilts her head back, and goes into subspace again. It’s uncanny. The lust in her eyes is just unbelievable. I can’t believe this.

I let her go.

“Sissie,” I say to the shop assistant. “I’m a man who likes to wear skirts. But I need pockets. Is there anything you guys make that I can wear on top of a skirt to give it pockets?”

She pulls out something. “This is a sample, and they’re not making anymore of them, and it’s only got one pocket. Try it.”

So I put it on over my cargo pants. It’s like a skirt, but has a long thin section that hangs down the front, mirrored at the back. The front bit has a pocket on it. “Ooooooooooo!” I say. “This would be perfect if it had more pockets. Please can’t you speak to the designer and tell her that I’d like to have this with more pockets?”

“I’ll speak to her,” she says.

I hand her my Coffee-Shop Schmuck business card, and she writes on it, ‘Apron. Six pockets.’

N. and I finally get to Primi. The manager recognises me somehow. “Roy!” he says. “Where you wanna sit?”

“Ah!” I say. “I recognise you! You and I had a tussle about my beret, didn’t we?”

“Yeah,” he says, showing us to a prime table. He and I had a fight when I was sitting in the Primi Piatti lounge some weeks ago. They have a ‘no-head-gear-for-men’ policy, which I think is crazy and dumb. So I refused to take my hat off when three waiters made the request. Finally, the manager arrived, and explained that it was national policy for Primi. And I said, “If Michael Jackson came here to fuck little boys, would you make HIM take off his hat?”

“Michael Jackson?” he said. “Of course! We’ve had Hollywood film stars here and we’ve asked THEM to take off their hats!”

So now he recognises me, and I’m getting some kind of VIP treatment for some strange reason. Could be cos I’m with the beautiful N. People take beauty very seriously indeed.

We order a California pizza and a grilled vegetable salad to share. The pizza is delicious. I’m less enamoured with the salad, but N. digs it.

“You’ve gone into subspace twice now,” I say to her. “Looks like you kinda like this?”

“I do.”

“You’re a natural. Are you going to ditch this boyfriend of yours? Or are you going to see if he can get into this?”

“Maybe he’ll be able to get into it,” she says.

“Well,” I say, “if you’re going to do it, I’ve got some pointers for you.”

I spend the evening giving her tips that I’ve picked up in my brief exposure to this stuff. And in telling her, I realise that I know a lot about it. It’s as though I’ve been in touch with this for years, but just didn’t know it. I’ve gone from virgin to guru in just two or three D/s fuck sessions! Wild.

Near the end of the evening, I say to N., “Would you like me to pull your hair?”

“Oh! Oh yes please!” she purrs.

I pour her hair into my hand, wrapping it slowly around my fingers. With the other hand, I stroke her face, her neck. And I gradually apply force to her black hair. Delicately, I take her head backwards, forcing her chin to point at the ceiling. She’s in the damned subspace zone. She’s fully there. If I keep this up, she’ll be coming without any sexual contact whatsoever. This is the biggest frigging rush! Oh man.

“Ditch the boyfriend,” I say. I want to do stuff with this woman. Oh yeah. Oh.

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Cafe Ove Flo, Greenside

by Roy Blumenthal on July 29, 2004

Thursday, July 29, 2004

Service: * * * *

Food: * * * *

Ambience: * * * *

Babe Count: * *

Phone: +27 11 486 4576

On the table beside my plate is a book that Erich has hauled out of his library for me. “Have it,” he says. “I’m married. I won’t be needing it anymore.”

“You sure?” I say. “Janet’s not into this?”

He gives me a look. Doesn’t answer. Could be a yes. Could be a no. It’s a subject not for discussion, is what the look says.

The book is called COME HITHER: A Commonsense Guide to Kinky Sex by Gloria Brame. Wow!

Dean, our waiter, is a little blasé about such literature lying about on the table. He’s less blasé about another item Erich’s been showing me. “I got the size wrong,” Erich says. “Here. See if it fits you.”

I try it on. It’s got a weird press-stud pattern in the front. “Cool design,” I say.

“They’ve patented it,” he says.

“It’s a tiny bit too big,” I say. “And it would be ideal, but it just doesn’t have enough pockets for my needs.”

I’m wearing a hand-made Utiliti-kilt that Erich has brought in from the States. “I got the damn size wrong,” he says. “So I thought I’d offer it to you before sending it back. I know you want to wear skirts too.”

“Erich,” I say, patting the black pleats, “more pockets. That’s all I can say.”

“No prob,” he says.

Dean says, “Looks like a great waiter’s apron.” He tries it on. Looks bloody good.

Maybe I should buy it off Erich. But nah. I’ve got to be able to put my glasses in it. And my cellphone. And my palmtop. And its keyboard. And my little Moleskine notebook. (People — there’s an ‘e’ at the end of that word, by the way. It’s not MoleSKIN. It’s MoleSKINE. With an e. Not without an e. Sheeesh. Get it right, man.) And stuff for my contact lenses when I’m wearing them. And and and.

Which is why I wear cargo pants. And I’ve got to empty those pockets whenever I go to Kobo Jutsu on a Tuesday night. And when I go to therapy on Thursdays. Which is today. Yikes. “I’ve gotta get to therapy,” I tell Erich.

“Hey, Dean,” I say. “I need to write down what Erich and I ate. This place is definitely going onto my website.” I hand him a Coffee-Shop Schmuck business card. And I write down the delectable grub we ate. I had the broccoli and pecorino pesto penne. Erich had the gorgonzola gnocchi. I couldn’t resist dessert, so I had a kiwifruit cheesecake. And it was awesome. Most cheesecakes in restaurants taste like shaving foam. This one tastes like some kinda heaven. Erich had the strawberry mille feuilles. Lipsmacking wonderland.

I skedaddle to therapy.

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JB Rivers, Hyde Park

by Roy Blumenthal on July 27, 2004

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Service: * * *

Food: * * * 1/2

Ambience: * * * *

Babe Count: * * * * *

Phone: +27 11 325 5055

You know, being a serial monogamist can be a bit of a bitch.

I’ve been sitting here reading and playing solitaire on my palmtop since after a late lunch with Eran. He’s flying to Israel tomorrow for a holiday, and to scout out some filmmaking possibilities for the production company we’re forming together.

Yesterday he and I went to see Standard Bank in Sandton to see about opening a business account and getting starting capital of R1.5 million. We’re still in extremely preliminary stages, and we may look for a partner. But it was a fun exercise. Near the end of the conversation, I said to the three bankers, “Hey, if we open our account here, we’ll just have to invite you to set one day, to see what really goes on behind the scenes. Would you be keen on such a thing?” They almost blew their wads then and there. “Yes! Oh, yes! Please remember us when you have a shoot!” they said.

What a babe. And what bad timing. Here I get a second chance at wooing a serously lovely girl, but I'm now tied up in monogamy. Ah well. It least I got to feast my eyes.Right now, I’m sitting minding my own business, and my glasses are on the table. I’m giving my eyes a rest from contact lenses, which I’ve now been wearing successfully for the last month. The left eye is feeling a bit deranged, but it’s tolerating the lens! Viva!

So, with my specs on the table, I can’t really make out the features of the babe who’s just sat down two tables away. She’s waving at me.

I pop the glasses on, and I recognise her, but I can’t figure out where from.

I walk over to her table. She’s there with an older guy, in his sixties, and she’s in her early thirties. Long blonde hair. Greenish eyes. Incredible cheek bones. Dimples. Bod. This is babe heaven for me. Where the heck do I know her from??

She says, “You drew me one night –”

And before she can finish her sentence, I know where I know her from. She’s the one that got away. The delicious woman I sketched at Piatto in Cresta late June. The babe whose number I didn’t take. I say, “Piatto in Cresta. My name’s Roy.”

“Annette,” she says, and we shake hands. I’m now only dimly aware of the dude at the table, and I’m kinda locked into her gaze. “And this is Peter,” she says.

I shake Peter’s hand. “Pleased ta meet ya,” he says in a Cockney accent.

“Join us for a drink?” says Annette.

Sigh. Okay. I get my satchel and join them.

The joys of monogamy.

Seeing as I’m exploring a relationship with Karen, I’ve decided that I’m not going to be pursuing relationships with other women at the moment. But I’m also treading a delicate balance. I don’t KNOW that things with Karen will work. And nor do I know whether or not we’re really suited to each other. So I don’t want to close off possibilities too strongly. But I do want to be honest and upfront and clear. And I don’t want anybody getting hurt.

So right now I’m thinking it’ll be okay to have coffee with people. Like Annette. And some of the women I’m corresponding with from the internet dating service.

An added complication for me now is the fact that my new sexual journeyings are on this site. And babes I speak to are immediately given the web address. So I’m kinda open book. Which might not be to everyone’s taste. But hey. I’m an individual. And I have a broad mind, now even broader, and that’s who I am. As Charlotte Kasl says in ZEN AND THE ART OF FALLING IN LOVE: “If you want love and friendship, you must walk the path undisguised.”

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Wiesenhof, Killarney

July 26, 2004

Monday, July 26, 2004
Service: * * * 1/2
Food: * * 1/2
Ambience: * *
Babe Count: * * * *
As usual, Danny’s a joy of a waiter. Very pleasant, paying attention to details like ensuring that I have [...]

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Karen’s Place, Northgate

July 24, 2004

Saturday, July 24, 2004
Service: * * * * *
Food: * * * * *
Ambience: * * * * *
Babe Count: * * * * *
Okay, so I’ve got some adjustments to make, aside from things sexual. [...]

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Spaza Gallery, Troyeville

July 22, 2004

Thursday, July 22, 2004
Service: * * *
Food: * * * *
Ambience: * * *
Babe Count: * * * *
Linda, our model for tonight, is late. She got her mom to drive her to the wrong venue by mistake. Assumed that Spaza Gallery in [...]

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The Showcase Theatre, Banbury Cross, Northriding

July 21, 2004

Wednesday, July 21, 2004
Service: * *
Food: * * 1/2
Ambience: * * *
Babe Count: * * * *
Alistair Plint has invited me and a partner to an exclusive preview evening of a new standup comedy concept he’s created with a bunch of other comedians. [...]

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Doppio Zero, Greenside

July 18, 2004

Sunday, July 18, 2004
Service: * * * 1/2
Food: * * * 1/2
Ambience: * * * *
Babe Count: * * * * *
Phone: +27 11 646 8740
I’ve been shopping to prepare for this date with Karen. I have something stuffed into my satchel, away [...]

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Paputzi’s, Linden

July 17, 2004

Saturday, July 17, 2004
Service: * * *
Food: * * *
Ambience: * * * 1/2
Babe Count: * * * *
I’ve just met S., the third babe from the internet dating service I’m on. She’s a babe. Matches her photos nicely. “I don’t really like [...]

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The Spaza Gallery, Troyeville

July 15, 2004

Thursday, July 15, 2004
Service: * * *
Food: * * * *
Ambience: * * *
Babe Count: * * *
Lionel has sourced a really interesting model for the portrait circle tonight. That’s why Linda from Exclusive Books isn’t here tonight. She’ll be our model next [...]

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